Butts on Parade!

I think professional football is aweful. I’m not much of a spectator, I always prefer to be playing the sport as opposed to watching it, but pro ball is so regulated it just sucks.

With that being said, I’m totally tuning into the Super Bowl because it’s men in uniforms. The superbowl, to me, is like the Victoria’s Secret Fashion show, except with men and their uniformed-clad asses. Just call me Tina Belcher, because that’s who I feel like while watching this. That, or maybe it’s the wine.

I’m not entirely sure what it is, but a guy in a uniform, any uniform, is just sexy to me. 

A plumber in his cover-alls- sexy.

A cowboy in their cowboy clothes- sexy. Even sexier if it includes the hat.

A doctor or nurse in scrubs- fucking sexy. (It sucks when you’re pushing out a baby and your gyno walks in looking all hot in his scubs, like, could he just not do that while he’s elbows deep in my vag?)

Cable guy- whatever the hell they wear, it’s hot.

Armed forces/firemen/policemen/EMTs/any civil servicemen- the ultimate of ultimate sexy.

Athletes of any sport- sexy uniform asses! 

I literally cannot help it. I’m like a guy, but worse. I guess they call it a sapiosexual, but I never bothered to look into what that was, I’ve just been called that. Either way, if a guy is in a uniform, I will gawk shamelessly at them. Not because I want to be with them and get married and all of that romantic bullshit, but because it’s just freaking hot. Ha!


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