Eulogy.

“JUST YOUR EVERY DAY CRAZY PERSON, 32, passed away in her home, following an extensive battle with depression.

JYEDCP went to school, graduated high school, and got knocked up by some idiot at age 19. She went on to get a shit degree, from a shit college, and ended up slinging pizzas during the day while her kids were at school. She led a busy life, yet didn’t travel anywhere, and kept to herself. She alienated herself from her family and friends. In her spare time… wait. She didn’t have spare time, so she never painted, or did anything she enjoyed doing.

She is survived by her three children, (names withheld), that woke up and found her in her pajamas, dead, and in the bathroom. She is proceeded in death by her son, and numerous family members. No services are being held, because she was such an asshole to everyone, noone would care to show.”

I wrote this the day after I decided to not kill myself in my bathroom. Pathetic, isn’t it? 

While it is the most pathetic thing I have ever written, I’m glad I did. Now I see that I’m not done here. I might not have the best life, but for some reason that I’m not privy to yet, I’m still here. I’m not sure for how long, but I’m damn sure I’m not going out until I make my life better. Until my eulogy is so awesome, people will look and say, “God, her life sucked, but she sure had fun!”. 

I know it’s not going to be easy, and I’m still salty that my life is so crazy that I couldn’t even kill myself if I want to, but I’m going to make a conscious effort to not be a baby about it. I know my broke ass still is not going to be traveling anywhere cool, but, I mean, Ohio can be cool too right? And I can make the best of what I have, right? Guess I’ll find out!

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